Tuesday, July 5, 2011

What I used to take for granted........

I think I'm getting worse and worse at playing Monopoly....Abby won this morning and added up her total money and found out that she won by $13,597...then she wrote it on the big white board on the wall for everyone to see as they come in, I will take a picture and post it with the others we've taken this week.  I think it's time for another game! 

The doctors all just came by and after looking at her charts from yesterday, they feel like she's doing about the same, no change.  But they want to keep her for at least 24 hours more and have her spend some time with the child psychiatric team, just to make sure she's emotionally ready.  Abby thinks she is fine, and she always acts so strong and like eveything is okay, but she's got to be feeling a little anxious, and they want to address that.  Maybe it will help with her restless legs too.   The doctors told her that all of the transplant kids need to get help from the psychiatric team at some point in the process, it's just too much for anyone to take in.  So, I think when they give the docs the okay, if everything still looks stable, and we haven't gotten her new heart, we'll be able to go to our Sugarhouse home to wait.  The waiting is horrible, I HATE it!  It's like going to bed every night thinking it's Christmas Eve....and waking up the next morning and it's still not Christmas, over and over again.  I go from trying to be so optimistic and hopeful, to thinking maybe it's better to think it won't happen and just being surprised when it does, and then back to wanting to think positively again.  I just can't decide what is best to do.

I wanted to make a list of things that I used to take for granted, but that I never will again-

-weeding and taking care of my garden and my yard
-Walking through the front door and having my dogs be so excited to see me
-Sunday afternoons and dinner at my parent's house with Meri and Rich and the kids there too
-My daily 5:00 am workouts
-the nights when all of us were home together and we just hung out and played games or watched tv together
-only having to worry about my regular monthly bills
-having something to do every day
-Shave Ices by Harmons
-Riding my bike in beautiful St. George
-being alone sometimes
-being with lots of people sometimes
-Goofing off and making my kids laugh so hard they cry
-Watching my kids play sports
-Not worrying and thinking all the time
-being able to think about the future
-Not being waken up every 2 hours or more during the night
-seeing Abby without being connected to "things"
- no beeping
-being with my friends
-talking about normal, everyday things....nothing medical
-going to church with my family on Sunday
-taking my dogs for a walk
-cleaning my house-weird I know
-knowing what's going on with my kids, they've kind of been on their own lately
-going to the store and knowing we'll be home to eat the food
-always being content and happy
-knowing where I'll be and what I'll be doing each day, I love having a plan and a list
-being tan all summer long
-swimming- in the pool, in the lake, and maybe even the ocean :(
-a closet
-a home-cooked meal

Think about us when you do things, and try to enjoy them even more than usual, enjoy them for us!!!
I think Abby would love to receive some emails from you, she's probably getting bored with me and being in this hospital gets old too, it will help to keep her busy.  Her email address is abby.doman@yahoo.com. Some of you have asked for my email as well, because you can't post comments on the blog and you're not on facebook, so my email is domans4@yahoo.com.  Keep your fingers crossed, it must be getting close.

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