Monday, May 30, 2011

May 29th-Just another day in PCMD

Well....I think it's going to be a long day! When they came to take Abby's blood at 4:09...they let us sleep in today.....I couldn't go back to sleep, and guess what??? It's snowing outside right now. So I got up and have already started laundry. Britt just came back from a walk down the hall with another amazing story. She said that she just met a lady whose daughter is here because she had a heart transplant when she was younger and is a little sick now. After talking for a few minutes, Britt found out that she is from St. George, not only that, but she also works with the physical therapists that are helping Britt. So.....from St. George, daughter with a heart transplant, physical therapist that works with Britt's pt, I think I might have to spend some time talking with this lady today! Britt stayed over with us last night to um.......help (ya, whatever!) They were still awake and goofing off at 12:30. They were hanging out with one of our favorite nurses, Jess (he wasn't even assigned to us last night), and one of our favorite techs, Mike. I guess we like the guys. While I was trying to sleep, I could hear them in the background just laughing and having fun. The nurses and techs are so good to us, always! Especially these guys. They treat us like our family is far above the rest of the families here at the hospital, and like they would rather be helping us more than any other family too, or maybe they really would! Most of the doctors and nurses leave our room with a little smile on their face, a smile mixed with a little sadness though. I know this probably sounds weird to you, but I think I will miss being here little bit. We've been here for 12 days, we know every nurse and doctor and they know us (some of them maybe a little too well, I've had lots of long, personal chats with many of them), Abby can have whatever she wants to eat whenever she wants it and I don't have to cook it, no matter what happens, there's a nurse right outside our door, it's kind of like they've all become our friends now. But, even though we're leaving now, I know we'll be back at some point....hopefully after Abby has her new heart and is recovering from the surgery!

Yesterday was a fairly stable day for Abby, other than that her pulse went up over 100 a couple of times when she wasn't doing anything strenuous. We're not sure about this, I'll talk to the docs about it when they come in to check her out this morning. Everything else was good with her, she even plopped the box of goodies down on her bed (great box of treats by the way, thanks to all of you), and just dug in! This is good because they're worried about her calorie count. It was also a big day for me, I left the hospital twice and only panicked one of those times. Thanks to Becky Allred who came to visit and offered to stay with Abby for a bit while I went and got us lunch. Becky, we loved visiting and playing games with you, thanks for being there for us today. Then, later in the day, I had to drive Brock out to Alta View hospital to meet my dad so they could leave for St. George. This probably doesn't seem like a big deal to you, but it was big for me. Up to this point, I've been too scared to leave Abby's side for anything, so this was good for me. I did keep my phone in my hand the whole time I was gone, and I did have to call Ali to settle me down a little after I dropped off Brock, but for the most part, I did okay. Wow, how my life has changed in 10 days, sometimes it seems like I'm a totally different person. I used to be the happiest, most easy-going person I know. I loved to goof off and make people laugh whenever I could. I'm the one that would put chocolate on my teeth in the middle of our faculty meetings and then put a huge, disgusting grin on my face and then try to catch my friends eyes and make them laugh without Sandy, the principal knowing. I'm the one that started a long conversation at the drive-thru window at Dairy Queen, because I wanted to know the different between cheesecake and cheesequake ( I love to embarrass my kids), I'm the one that spent one whole night talking to my kids and singing a song I made up like I had a speech impediment and couldn't say my R's. I sounded a little like a Wonder Pet! I hope that sometime soon I can get back to being this person, it's way more fun than always being on the verge of tears and thinking so heavily about everything. This is too tiring for me!

Brock is back in St. George this week, and already having a hard time. He wants to be there to play football and spend time with his friends, but he knows he should be here with Abby and us. What a hard thing to have to go through, and I admire my kids for the strenght they've shown the past 10 days. They are amazing and are handling all of this in such a mature way. Their whole world has been turned upside down, but they're handling it with total grace and confidence, I love them for that. Please help Brock while he's in St. George, if you see him just give him a big hug and let him know that it's okay for him to be there right now, and when you're praying for Abby, remember Britt and Brock too, this is hard for them and they need the help almost as much as Abby. In a couple of hours we should find out if we're going to be able to leave tomorrow or not. I have mixed feelings about it, but at least we'll have some kind of a plan for the first time in a long time. I just have to have faith that whatever happens is what's supposed to happen, there is a purpose for everything, it's just not always manifested to us when we want it to be.

***Well, we just found out that because now her INR level is now too low, we will be staying here for at least a couple of days. I'm not sure if I should be happy or sad right now!

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