I know I'm a little slow with the blog this morning, but I have a good reason.......I finally slept last night, for a long time too!!!! It's amazing how much better I'm doing now that I've had my good friends here for a couple of nights taking care of me. Ali and Cozz, I love you. Last night they had Ali's cousin come to the hospital right before I was going to bed and she rubbed my neck and my shoulders and my hands and my feet, and it just completely relaxed me for the night. She said she couldn't believe the tension that I was carrying in my neck and shoulders, I couldn't believe it either once I relaxed a little bit. I don't think I've taken a deep breath in the past 10 days! I woke up today feeling a little more rested, still tired, but better. Now if we can work on the food. I'm having a hard time because when I eat, even if it's just a cracker, I get really bad stomach cramps. But, I think this will take care of itself eventually. I'm so sad they have to leave today, they've done a world of good for all of my family. It helps me so much to know that I have friends and people that are taking care of things in St. George (especially my kids when they are there), so I can focus on Abby here.
Abby is still feeling as well as can be expected right now. She gets out of bed and walks around, she's back to her old self again-telling the nurses exactly how to do their jobs :) I never thought that I would say this, but it's so incredible to see her old spunk again. Things are pretty stable right now, thank goodness. Because her INR levels (this has to do with the coumadin medication she has to take) were up again, we get to stay here probably until Tuesday, that's if everything keeps going as it is now. Things are still up in the air though, I think that they always will be for a little while now. The one thing I prayed for yesterday was that we wouldn't be kicked out until at least Monday when we can move into our new place, about 2 minutes later the doctors came in and said it would be at least a couple more days. This was so good for me, it reminded me that He is here for me, sometimes right now that's easy to forget.
The greatest thing that happened yesterday was when Paul Cardall came to visit. Even how he got here was pretty amazing. A friend had recommended his book for me and I had started reading it and then I saw his name on Facebook and asked to be his friend and sent him a message telling him a little bit about Abby's story. Then I found out that my brother-in-law Rich had gone to school with him and had already talked to him about coming to see her. Then I found out that a teacher I taught with when I lived here (Teri Cooper) lived in his neighborhood and had also already talked to him about her. I think it was meant to be!!! When he got here, he just came in the room and started talking to Abby about his experience with waiting for the transplant and everything that happened after. He just sat in a chair next to her bed and talked like she was the only one in the room. He said the perfect things, both for me and for her. He made Abby and all of us in the room feel so hopeful and peaceful, it was amazing. These are some of the things that he said:
-He looked right into her eyes and said, "Abby, you will get a heart, you will survive this!"
-Miracles Happen! He said this more than once and then that's what he signed his book and cd with that he brought for her.
-When I asked him if he felt guilty about receiving someone else's heart he said: You might have survivor's guilt, and that's okay, it's normal. The way I look at is that somebody died for me to extend my life, but Christ died for me so I could live forever.
-He talked about how he climbed Mt. Olympus 6 months after he received his heart which was a pretty amazing feat!
-He talked a lot about beating the odds, and that it's good that she's an athlete because she's competitive, and it's all about the attitude.
-One thing that was important to me that he said was that the doctors give you the worst case scenario, they paint a bleak picture (then he laughed and said maybe he shouldn't be telling us that) but that she can overcome anything.
-he showed Abby her scar, she was so impressed.
-He also talked a lot about courage, and how important it is and what is most important is what's in your head.
After he spent so much time talking to us, we walked down to the grand piano, and he did a personal concert for Abby. We pushed her wheelchair right next to the piano and he played 2 songs that he had written. Then he played his own arrangement of I Am a Child of God. Abby just sat and listened, it was the most peaceful I have felt in a long time. Abby told him that she also played the piano, and he said that here is something special about pianos and hearts and that she needs to keep playing no matter what!
We had lots of visitors again because of the holiday, it was really nice. I feel bad when people are here and Abby is asleep or if doctors need to see her, just be understanding with that, she wants to see you and talk to you! And, just know that sometimes if you're here, I might cry, but that's okay. It's too hard to just be stong sometimes, usually I'm good about keeping it in when visitors are here, but sometimes I just can't. We love you and appreciate everything that's happening for us everywhere. Today let's pray that we can keep feeling that peace we did when we were listening to Paul.
"The way I look at is that somebody died for me to extend my life, but Christ died for me so I could live forever." I love this comment! It brought tears to my eyes. There is so much hope for you all to hang on to, so keep hanging on, no matter what! Attitude really is everything when facing adversity and it's okay to feel all the other feelings you may be feeling too. Thank you so much for sharing your experience because you guys are amazing and you all inspire me. Abby, you will make it through this, and you will climb your own version of Mt. Olympus just 6 months after your transplant too. You go girl (Little Domanator!)
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